Now I am the last one to condone our modern Cult of Entitlement : the ‘I must have nothing but the best’, the ‘I am what I own’ , the ‘Because I’m worth it’ consumption overkill. Living for two years in Third World conditions – no cheese in the shops for about four months; in mini-market freezers you found post-sell-by-date ‘recycled’ frozen meats, formerly part of aid packages imported from African countries - I learned to live in a capital city where an entire trawl of the shops revealed nothing I would want to buy. The gilt was removed from the shopping gingerbread when you arrived in GB with a huge list of essentials to buy at top speed. When durable shoes (sturdy enough to withstand dirt-track roads and the rainy season) and loose-fitting natural-fibre clothes figure on your shopping list along with water-purifying tablets and anti-diarrhoea pills (amoebic dysentery was rife there ), being a consumer definitely lost its lustre.
So, I am coming from a particular direction, but I’m a pensioner, give me a break, I’ve worked for it! My personal treat, my act of self-indulgence was to become a member of a Wellness Centre Spa.
Let’s deal with that title first off. Apart from the initial impression of WC and its attendant associations – crossword fans will get that! – what the heck is wrong with ‘Health Centre’? There you feel people are out to make sure you’re working well. Okay, ‘…in sickness and in health’ may not sound too positive, but ‘a healthy appetite’ collocates…. well, as does, ‘health, wealth and happiness’ in , for example, New Year greetings. “A healthy mind in a healthy body’ was what they aimed for in classical times – that can’t be bad. And, of course, my favourite convivial wishes in both Gaelic and Greek: ‘ Slainte mhath’ or ‘Sthn geia saV ‘, ‘Your good health!’ But this pc-sounding contrived wellness? ….. well…!!
Ever the Scot, I managed to get a good deal: a couple rate – on the grounds that my friend and I, registering at the same time, were married…. just not to each other….. then that reduction was rounded down.J
How many of us have at the beginning of the school year gone through the pain of worrying about ourselves or our children fitting into a new environment, be it school, residence or workplace? Will we cope? Will we put a foot wrong? Confidence is gained through familiarity, moving beyond the usual, outside your comfort zone is …an educational experience.
First lesson – I make a mental note to bring flip-flops for use in the showers to stop slipping on the wet marble floor and to avoid paddling in the soapy slops of previous shower-users. The pool is gloriously warm and empty and I notch up an hour’s swimming before the first “Power Program’ lesson begins. We have to warm up on the treadmill which I am wary of having read of a Hollywood star who got the speeds wrong and was thrown off, breaking bones and losing teeth. On I go and build speed gradually. Then catch sight of myself in the wall mirrors – is this the face of confidence? Back stooped, steely grip on the plastic tubing, leaning forward, head down, appearing to run to catch up, rather than being in charge. Surreptitious glances at experienced users help improve my stance, and then I ease into the rhythm of the background music and realize I’m …..taking things in my stride!
And that was only the warm-up. Then we move on to a selected range of metal contraptions. You stand and pull handles out, you stand and pull handles down, you sit and pull handles down, you sit and raise a bar with your legs (ooph!!) and finally do squats with a weight in each hand.
So how do I do? Alignment is all and, like trees here lean in harmony with the prevailing Vardaris wind, so I invariably incline at a general heaving angle rather than keeping the back-straight, upright position required. It is also very embarrassing when you drop your guard along with the handles/ bar, causing resistant weight loads to come crashing down with a resounding metallic clang – all eyes on the clanger!
At each contraption we do 20 ‘moves’ before speeding on to the next designated exercise area. I confess I’m only just beginning to get alignment and rhythm together when it’s time to move on and you have to keep pace with the other users.
Still, it is my first time. I feel muscles tingle from the work-out. I feel up to the challenge. This is not bad at all. A touch of irony is that two of the bank of overhead TV screens show cooking demonstrations - here I am trying to get fit, to work off the blubber accumulated from gastronomic indulgence and there's stereo temptation up ahead !
